One day, perhaps...

"A joy it will be one day, perhaps, to remember even this." --Aneas (from Virgil's Aneid)

Things have been moving at a fast pace these days-- it looks like I have a date set for my defense: Friday, August 9th! It also happens to be Baby H's birthday. Only to bring me luck, of course.

Everyone was on board at a recent committee meeting and the discussion was surprisingly pleasant. This helped my confidence a lot, and reinforced what I have been saying since I've realized it: start this process early! Get a committee and get them involved as soon as you can. Group meetings are even better because of the discussion they drive-- not just a benefit for you and your project, but the discussion amongst the faculty with their peers allows them to bicker between each other and not with you. Really, everybody wins here.

There is a visible light at the end of this 6-year-long tunnel. Finally.

Now it's jut a matter of getting all of my remaining experiments done, dissertation written, and papers submitted! Yeah... sound like a lot? Because it is. But, I think my excitement and the prospect of ACTUALLY BEING DONE has overtaken any extreme feelings of stress. In the last months, the project has been streamlined and is manageable. I know exactly which experiments need to get done, and, barring any serious contamination/mysterious lab issues, it will get done on time.

The writing part is somewhat daunting. I like writing, but it is quite the time-consuming process for me. Actually, it's just consuming in general. Writing consumes me, and in order for me to produce a product I'm satisfied with, it's essential that it does. It is an art form that breeds and destroys perfectionists. And, hardest of all, there is no real way to know when you're "done" writing something. It will forever seem like something can be tweaked and changed, something could be said differently, or expanded upon. In the end, though-- at least with a dissertation-- it doesn't matter.... It all has to be in there, the data, the story, but in the end, it just needs to be finished.

Bacon, Egg, and Cheese, Please!

I had the most amazing bacon and egg sandwich from a local place this past weekend. I have shied away from it for months since it was an overpriced version of something available in any New York street corner deli. This, however, was not just any sandwich and well worth the $6 + clogged arteries. The bacon from Portage Bay Cafe is worth it on its own; everything else is just a bonus.


Not actual sandwich.

Unfortunately for my psyche, I have also recently started watching the amazing documentary 'Weight of the Nation' put out by the CDC and NIH. The film addresses the obesity epidemic and ill health effects arising in its wake here in the great U.S. of A. The film in its entirety is long, but is nicely broken into 4 parts. It's incredibly informative and well done. Much of the information will not be completely new to most people, but to see it all strung together, to see the data, the numbers, the alarming effects of obesity on our bodies and health, on our children.... it is sure to astonish and floor even the well informed.

The Bogalusa Heart study featured in the film (which went on from 1972-2005) shed light on many aspects of the early development of coronary artery disease and hypertension. One of the most novel conclusions from this study, as the film states, is that the major causes and hallmarks of adult heart disease, (atherosclerosis, coronary heart disease, hypertension, etc) begin in childhood. Documented anatomic changes occur by 5 to 8 years of age.

Translated, this means that a poor diet of fast food as a kid in conjunction with little exercise and other poor health habits WILL harm you later in life. It will, it does, you can see it very clearly presented in this film. The visuals speak for themselves.

Access to affordable healthy foods and education are part of the solution, ensuring that a majority of people in this country can provide a healthier life for themselves and their families. This is obviously a large and multifaceted issue, but ignoring it and not taking measures to make these options a reality is no longer an option. The economic costs alone are mounting and are unsustainable for the country on a whole. We need more conversations and smart, thinking minds coming up with solutions to this far-reaching problem. Start here--Watch it and spread the word!

"Preach the Gospel always. If necessary, use words." -St. Francis of Assisi

In light of recent events at my old high school where a teacher who came out as transgender was fired after more than 30 years of teaching, I was compelled to resume my stagnant writing.

Mark Krolikowski, known as Mr. K, was one of my favorite and best teachers at St. Francis Preparatory School. He taught several religion classes, including Human Sexuality & Love and Social Justice. He often focused on the value of tolerance, respect, and empathy. He is dynamic and funny, relatable and kind; when I was there, he also had wild red hair, and donned flamboyant alligator-skin shoes and several hoop earrings in both ears. He was a favorite of many students and teachers alike.

From my understanding, his hair had grown too long, the manicures were too frequent, and most of all, after 32 years of teaching, a student complained. As a result, Mr. K not only came out to his Catholic school administration as transgender but was fired by the hypocritical institution. The school has notoriously been more concerned with money and unevenly enforcing a dress code than actually upholding Catholic/Christian values or the best interest of its students. Firing Mr. K, a highly valued and respected teacher, highlights it all, reigniting anger and bitterness in me than I thought had dissipated over the years.

The administration sent several messages by firing Mr. K. Not only do they not value an excellent teaching record of 30+ years, they boldly demonstrated that they will not tolerate people who appear different and do not comply with their ideal mold. One of the saddest (and perhaps less obvious) consequences of such actions is its deliberate and inconsiderate removal of an ally, an accepting and supportive voice in a sea of intolerance. You see, SFP, no matter how hard you try to suppress and eliminate these 'deviants,' there are gay/queer/transgender/different people roaming your halls every day. They are teachers, staff, and students. Like I was. Many of whom already feel isolated and unwanted. And you, beacons of Catholic teachings, the supposed embodiment of the Franciscan brotherhood, have only reinforced these sentiments here.

For many of us, high school is merely something we survive. Something we just try to get through with some self-esteem intact. Many teenagers struggle with feelings of not fitting in-- for various reasons-- and have trouble with the conformity required in many high schools. Sometimes, this conformity is societally placed, causing teens to believe they need to dress or think a certain way in order to be accepted by their peers. In a Catholic school, in SFP, that conformity is multifacted and hypocritical, resulting from societal pressures as well as the outdated Catholic dogma. Enforcing a dress code in a private school is nothing new; enforcing it with more gusto than a supposed zero-tolerance drug policy is ridiculous. The religious influences serve more to suppress dissenting voices and opinions than it does to foster love and kindness.

If we're lucky, in high school (as in the rest of life) we may find a few supportive mentors along the way. They come in the form of friends and teachers; some of us might even owe our lives to these people. Especially in an inherently suffocating environment, these mentors are so valuable. Congratulations, Prep, for dismissing a non-judgmental, supportive shoulder to lean on. St. Francis is attributed with the quote, "Preach the gospel always. If necessary, use words." In reflecting the sentiments of your patron saint and the goodness of Christianity, you failed.